


lost my heart

by peskylilcritter



Series: after the end of the world (Ben and Ani) [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Grief/Mourning, Smoking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 15:57:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19276582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peskylilcritter/pseuds/peskylilcritter
Summary: Obi-Wan's world ended years before Order 66. He's just trying to keep everyone else's world from ending too.





	lost my heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [HellsBellsSinClub](https://archiveofourown.org/users/HellsBellsSinClub/gifts).



Blue and Seven are among the first to regain control, after Order 66, and end up clinging to each other in silent grief and regret.

There was no body, so maybe he lived, they tell each other. Kenobi does impossible things on the regular so maybe…

When the whispers start, of Amidala and her pointless rebellion, they don’t even need to talk about it. There was never any other option.

*

Yoda leaves first, in a small shuttle.

Obi-Wan can’t bear to watch him go, to be left alone in truth. To say one more goodbye.

“I don’t mean to sound like I want to get rid of you but do you have somewhere to go? Somewhere safe?”

Well, not entirely alone.

Obi-Wan turns to give Bail a weak smile. “There’s nowhere safe for me, or any Jedi. But…” he hesitates. “There might be somewhere I can go. I’ll need your help.”

Bail nods. “Of course. Whatever you need.”

*

“Obi-Wan!” Padmé shouts and reaches for him.

He forgets, sometimes, how strong she is but her arms around him are a comforting reminder.

He doesn’t realize he’s crying until she pulls away and he can hardly see her through the tears. She leads him to sit somewhere and pulls him close again.

This is the safest he’s been in months, and he finds he can longer stop himself from falling apart.

*

It’s no surprise to Padmé when Obi-Wan falls asleep more or less at the same time as he stops crying.

She doesn’t move, just keeps stroking his hair until she falls asleep too.

*

He sends word every few months, usually with a group of new recruits for the rebellion. She appreciates the gesture and worries anyway.

*

Nobody looks twice at Ben, with his dark hair and beard, the blasters half-concealed at his hips, wrapped in a warm cloak. He looks just like hundreds, thousands of others passing through this spaceport every day.

He’s standing near one of the entrances, watching the crowd with studied disinterest. It’s cold and windy, and from the look of the clouds it’ll rain within the hour.

Ben lifts the tabac stick to his lips, sucks in another lungful of smoke and pretends not to have noticed his little shadow. At least he can finally see them.

They’ve been following him for weeks and it’s taken him three tabac sticks to get them to slip up a little.

Someone bumps into him, making him curse as he tries to find his shadow again. Force fuck it. Gone. He won’t find them again today.

“Tabac? Really?” a familiar voice says behind him.

He whirls so fast he nearly loses his balance and stands there, staring. “Anakin?”

Anakin grins. “Surprise.”


End file.
